When we set out to make changes in our lives, negative self-talk can get in the way. Our minds craft stories that we eventually start to believe, and those stories don’t necessarily align with our lived reality. Here are some tips for challenging and breaking free of these negative thought cycles:
The first step to overcoming a challenge is to recognize its presence. Negative self-talk often takes a few forms: personalizing, magnifying, catastrophizing, polarizing and mind reading. It may sound like “I’m not good enough” or “I can’t do this,” or it may be a spiral that stems from a simple thought and becomes all-encompassing.
When negative self-talk is the default, it can be hard to see. However, to break the pattern, you first need to examine it within yourself. When you feel yourself spiraling or being overly critical of yourself, stop and acknowledge it in the moment.
Once you realize you are in a negative thought cycle, you need to work to get out of it. This starts with questioning the validity of your thoughts. Consider asking yourself questions like:
For example, if you start thinking you will never lose weight because you slept in and didn’t make it to the gym, stop and reframe that thought. Sleeping in means that you need rest, not that you’ve lost sight of your goals. It’s a sign of what you should do next, which may be going to bed earlier or moving the gym routine to a better time. This is one way to take a destructive negative thought and change it into a constructive, useful tool.
The best way to combat negative thoughts is to treat yourself with kindness and understanding. Take the compassion you extend to others, and focus some of that energy on yourself. Remember, you also deserve grace. No one is perfect, and the same goes for weight loss journeys. People who will only do something when they feel it’s going perfectly are apt to give up. Keep up the good work, and applaud yourself when you accomplish a goal, big or small.
Our minds naturally guide us toward the negative, and we can forget about the great things we have achieved. Take some time each day to acknowledge what you have done well. Consider keeping a journal and writing at least one positive thing each day. Celebrating small victories on an ongoing basis will help you reframe your mindset. Negative thoughts will still break through, but they’ll become quieter over time.
Take a look at the people with whom you spend most of your time. Are they positive or negative influences? While you’re working on yourself, consider this, and try to spend more time with the people who make you feel good about yourself. Seek out supportive people, and seek out entertainment that supports your goals. Set boundaries with people and other influences that bring you down.
Much like your overall wellness journey, you won’t fix a negative mindset overnight. Challenge your negative thoughts and give yourself grace, and you’ll be on the path to a better mindset. Overcoming negative self-talk is hard work, but you can do it!
